Rick Wagoner, CEO of GM: Hello?
Barack Obama, POTUS: Hello, Rick, this is Barack Obama.
RW: Yes, Mr. President! How are you?
POTUS: Well, Rick, not so good, actually.
RW: Really, Mr. President? Why?
POTUS: Well, Rick -- I'm sorry it's come down to this.
RW: Uh oh...
POTUS: Yup, I'm sorry, Rick. We, as an organization, have decided to move in a different direction...
RW: Yes?
POTUS (hurried): So, we're going to have to let you go.
RW: Well, I think we all knew it was going to happen sometime...
POTUS: But I'm sure that you'll receive a nice severance package. We've worked it out -- 2 weeks pay for every year you've worked at GM, so... that makes it somewhere around $500,000. Hey -- that's not too bad...
RW: Well, I guess I'm not buying that cottage in Maine this summer.
POTUS: Well, no, probably not. Well, Rick, you're a nice guy and I'm sure you can get a job somewhere.
RW: Uh, thanks, Mr. President. I think I'll take a couple of months off, you know, hang out with the kids, breathe a little bit.
POTUS: Hey, Rick?
RW: Yeah?
POTUS: How does it feel to have destroyed 90% of shareholder value in ten years?
RW: (silence)
POTUS: Well, Rick -- there will be a couple of guys to uh, help you pack up in a couple of hours... do leave the keys to the executive washroom in the center drawer of your desk, okay?
RW: (silence)
POTUS: Good luck -- I gotta go talk to Geithner -- that scamp, he's always in deep.
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